Keeping Busy
YIKES!! I miss you too Phyllis. I know I have been busy and phone tag has been a thing with a few people. I am trying to catch up but with the time change I hesitate to call after 9:00. I know all to well about tough decisions, you are doing what is best, don't second guess yourself for a second!! I love you!
I have begun one on one counseling...much better!! She seemed to validate where I was in my process of grieving and that was refreshing. I thought I was doing really well, I just needed to hear it from a professional that I was. I know that may sound strange, but she agreed that I have been grieving along time and that moving on was ok. Even though I miss Craig terribly, it is ok to begin to move forward with MY life even if has only been a short time since his death. I really needed to hear that.
I went to a wedding at the Coronado on Saturday night. That was tough. It was a beautiful wedding and brought back many emotions. I thought I would just eat and leave, but I stayed till the end. I did not dance or anything and I had to go out and compose myself a few times, but I stayed. I think that was much bigger than a "baby step" for me. It was really my first time out socially as a "single" person. I did feel out of place and very alone. Especially when slow dances were playing. I cannot tell you how much I missed Craig that night. (tears are flowing pretty freely now!) Also there was an empty chair next to me at dinner.....UGH!
I have started working on my Hope Center again. That has been a great help too. It gives me purpose and drive to know I helping again. The symposium is just around the corner as well. I have been thinking about what to say at the acceptance speech. I wish Emily could just do it for me!! She is gifted when it comes to writing and speaking. Maybe I will have her record it and then I will just move my mouth...
Phyllis, Lee, Emily and hopefully Kyle are coming to DC to be to see me accept this amazing honor for Craig and I. If anyone else wants to come let me know
BELIEVING...Shelly
p.s. Thank you notes....still pending....I am still struggling.
I have begun one on one counseling...much better!! She seemed to validate where I was in my process of grieving and that was refreshing. I thought I was doing really well, I just needed to hear it from a professional that I was. I know that may sound strange, but she agreed that I have been grieving along time and that moving on was ok. Even though I miss Craig terribly, it is ok to begin to move forward with MY life even if has only been a short time since his death. I really needed to hear that.
I went to a wedding at the Coronado on Saturday night. That was tough. It was a beautiful wedding and brought back many emotions. I thought I would just eat and leave, but I stayed till the end. I did not dance or anything and I had to go out and compose myself a few times, but I stayed. I think that was much bigger than a "baby step" for me. It was really my first time out socially as a "single" person. I did feel out of place and very alone. Especially when slow dances were playing. I cannot tell you how much I missed Craig that night. (tears are flowing pretty freely now!) Also there was an empty chair next to me at dinner.....UGH!
I have started working on my Hope Center again. That has been a great help too. It gives me purpose and drive to know I helping again. The symposium is just around the corner as well. I have been thinking about what to say at the acceptance speech. I wish Emily could just do it for me!! She is gifted when it comes to writing and speaking. Maybe I will have her record it and then I will just move my mouth...
Phyllis, Lee, Emily and hopefully Kyle are coming to DC to be to see me accept this amazing honor for Craig and I. If anyone else wants to come let me know BELIEVING...Shelly
p.s. Thank you notes....still pending....I am still struggling.
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